5.1. Attachments of Jesus

There's a lot of speculation about how Jesus and Mary loved each other, but many comments seem to romanticize their relationship based on modern family dynamics. From Scripture, we see Jesus as an independent person who isn’t attached to Mary. He asks, 'Why are you looking for me?' and refers to her as 'Woman, behold your son,' rather than saying goodbye as one might expect. He also says, 'Who is my mother?' These words suggest that His relationship with her was not about dependence or attachment.

Mary, too, seems to have learned over the years. From her initial question, 'Why are you doing this to us?' to witnessing the death of her Son, she likely felt sorrow but did not react with hysteria. She did not cling to Jesus as if He were her mental security. This reflects a deeper understanding of His mission. Similarly, when Jesus tells Magdalene not to cling to Him, it shows that His love for her (and others) was not about dependence or attachment.

Jesus wasn’t mad when His disciples denied or tricked Him, which shows He didn’t develop a traumatic reaction to betrayal. He didn't seek escapism through human relationships or objects, as we often see in romantic couples. His love for God wasn’t about ecstasy or exclusive closeness, as with John. Instead, Jesus calls all His disciples to love one another as He has loved them—not just in the way He loved John or Peter. Affection is secondary to the command to love one another in a selfless, non-dependent way.